So over the past few days, I have composed close to ten different drafts and sent every single one of them to the trash can. I would begin writing about one thing and eventually that’d branch off into a load of mumbo-jumbo. Now, here we are…
I’ve been a member of this glorified dating game for a few months now. It’s become a bore and I guess having my own personal standards is making this so-called hunt a little bit harder than expected. For one, being an introvert doesn’t really give me much hope of amusing someone. But none of my friends are really the ultimate socialites. We dine, wine and talk a bucket load of shit. So you could say my dating life ranks rather low.
Having been labelled as single for the past year with the exception to the occasional fling, I think it is safe to say that clearly things don’t always play out how you’d hope. I mean my mother is still cracking the occasional joke about my single life. It’s somewhat worse than peer pressure because well, it’s your mum. What she doesn’t understand is that I just happen to be part of the generation that resembles a well-mounted large hay stack and the needle is hard to find. Of course this needle represents the amount of people who actually look for something more than a booty call.
Well, today something occurred to me that I honestly hadn’t thought about before. How I would describe myself? I mean that is pretty much as hard as trying to write your “About Me” section on almost anything. Even my ‘About Me’ page on this blog is a load of word vomit – I don’t exactly want to sit there and type an in-depth Q&A, I can’t even answer my own questions half the time. So I apologise to anyone who even bothers to read it.
But how would I describe myself? Well apart from the obvious introvert status that has been thrust upon me by the stupid people of today that decided life is black and white, but in light of the horrendous dating game – I think I’ve become an intimidation guru.
I think that I scare guys away, put them off and cause half the deceased conversations that I accumulate. Guys are intimidated by a female who has an opinion, a voice, goals and her own independence. Personally, I think that guys watch one too many romance movies. But The Notebook never had the Ryan Gosling in the limelight yet their relationship eventually blossomed.
Maybe guy’s think I’m high maintenance and complicated. Well, I’d rather know whats happening and ask questions than to be a shy girl standing in the corner that just acts as an accessory to you – like handbag to us. I’m not even going to waste my time with a guy that thinks I belong in the kitchen. If a guy thinks dating a voiceless, easily impressionable woman is what makes him a man then I feel sorry for both your manly ego and her lack of confidence which will be diminished with every word you say to her.
What happened to the relationships that challenge you, teach you and allow you to see things differently. Those are the relationships that’ll never have a boring dinner date. I don’t have a fancy degree in some highly noted academic field of study, but I’ve grown up with possibly more thick than thin moments and it’s how you experience and survive these things that make you who you are right?
So there you go, I’m a female with nerve and I intimidate guys unknowingly. HORRAHHH!