Well whilst you all endure Adele’s emotional ‘Hello’, I must remind each and every one of you that sometimes you need to say goodbye. Goodbye can be good and it can be bad, it depends purely on the nature of its context.
I say goodbye to my father every weekday morning when he drops me off at the train station.
I wished my boyfriend goodbye this morning as he boarded an aeroplane for a family holiday in America.
I wished my pals’ goodnight after a Christmas gathering just last night.
We say goodbye all the time, sometimes goodbye can be hard and sometimes people just don’t want to say goodbye. By “sometimes you don’t want to say goodbye”, I mean those times when someone walks into your life and you find them somewhat amusing but everyone knows they’re bad for you but you keep them anyway.
For instance, remaining friends with an old one night stand who – even though you found out after the fact – has a girlfriend is a perfect example of a goodbye. A necessary goodbye. It shouldn’t hurt nor should it be delayed. This is toxic, he’s a liar and a cheater. He was on Tinder even though he was months into a supposedly monogamous relationship. These people you don’t keep tabs on, you erase them from your life. If they begin a conversation you end the conversation by ignoring him.
This exact scenario happened to a close friend of mine – literally just a few days ago he contacted her. She has opted to string him along to find out if he is still with his girlfriend. This is wrong. Why would you waste your time and energy on a liar? You know he has a better half but he doesn’t know that. He is using you for pure amusement and you think you’re clearly going to win by dumping his ass after a lengthy conversation. No matter which way you turn, guys like this will never tell you the truth, why would they? If they have any shot at a root and boot situation, they’ll take it. All you’re doing is feeding out of the palm of his hand.
Another pal of mine – male this time – dated this stunning woman once. But she left him, just dumped his ass after a few weeks or months of what sounded like happiness. She is single once again and he literally messaged me not too long ago asking if he should go for “round two”.
Well look at it this way, if she’s left you once before, what makes you think she wouldn’t do it again?
You clearly didn’t grasp her heart and she lost interest. Why would you volunteer to put yourself through the exact same thing once again? There is no such excuse as testing the waters, you don’t just leave someone to try someone else – we aren’t plates of cuisine in the middle of the dining room table. Well at least that’s not morally how it works, but each to their own.
In this case, there’s not so much a goodbye since you never let her back – but definitely don’t say hello!
Saying goodbye is sometimes for the best, spring clean the toxic people surrounding you. If you don’t want a fuckboy around, don’t let them in. If you don’t want to be hurt, leave it at goodbye. Learning when to say goodbye takes time and at the worst, a broken heart. But we all have to do say it whether we like it or not.