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Zero Fucking Fucks

Do you ever just sit there and wonder about all the pointless shit in life? Well I do, quite often if I might add – it’s purely a series of pointless thoughts now that I come to think of it.

Yesterday, my pals (technically only one pal sent it, but it was in a group chat so I’ll be inclusive) sent me a meme, the wording was; ‘Don’t you hate those people who post shit like “does anyone know what time the doctors open?” Like just go fucking Google it for fuck sake Susan’. That one passage alone resembles the conversations I’ve endured with another close pal of mine for the past few weeks. It’s as if fatigue affects her intellect and brain function.

You’re probably wondering just how bad it could be, like how can someone be so dim about life’s intimate details? Well here is what she asked me, “What size Nike socks do I buy on ASOS?” Given I have provided her recent Nike sock purchases in a bulk order, you would assume one would check the sizing that Nike actually stitch into the socks inside. Needless to say I didn’t provide her with any answer other than “Whatever size is on the inside of the socks you already own”. This is certainly not the first occasion of brainless thinking, we also have the short-term memory loss incidences. Before I posed like a French girl for some ink, I seeked recommendations from a basketball teammate in a group chat she was a part of and then further invited her to accompany me to the location of the parlor – to which she declined. Just the other day she asked me what parlor I visited and then continued on to ask me of its location – because Google was simply too difficult to use. I am pretty certain that most tattoo parlors are independent and thus they would all be individually named.

I don’t know if you would read any of the above as pointless, but I all I noted was that she has very little vested interest in anything I have mentioned in the past dozen years.

But of course that is not the only topic of pointless shit I wish to rant over today, I’m going to move onto the novelties of life that people carelessly invest in; “Baby on board” signage in the rear windows of motor vehicles. There is not a single soul in this country that is going to give a fuck about you sign when they collide with you. Do people actually think that just because you have a sign informing others that you are a parent is going to make the person behind drive with more care than they usually would? People hardly drive politely for a learner driver, like I remember all the times no one would let me merge onto the freeway let alone be patient in any scenario involving my giving way to others.

Then there are the weird people who spend money on stickers in order to display their family on their vehicle windows. These stickers are like AUS $5.00 each and I have seen cars with not only stickers detailing the mother, father and children, but they also purchase stickers for their family pets. Why does everyone need to know you have multiple pets? It’s not like they ride in the car with you on a daily basis with their head out the window catching a breeze.

I mean everything above is as pointless as a five cent coin.

With all that said and done, I’d like to ensure you all that I give zero fucks to any pointless shit you wish to dish up. Ziltch.

Zero Fucking Fucks.

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